How to lose years off your life

Have a conversation with your 5 year old that goes along these lines:

Jessica: "Mom, when can I drive?"

Mom: "A car?"

Jessica: "Yes."

Mom: "In about 10 years."

Jessica: "But that's when I'm going to be pregnant.

Mom, hoping she didn't hear right: "What?!"

Jessica: "But that's when I'm pregnant" (it got even better the second time).

Mom: "No no no no...you are not going to be pregnant for AT LEAST 20 years." (please)

I will now commence drinking a large glass of wine to soothe my frazzled nerves.